The connections we make with other people is what gives meaning to life, but as we all know being a part of a relationship often brings up challenges. I specialize in working with couples to assist them in working together to find ways to resolve issues, reduce conflict and increase intimacy and connection.
Who should engage in couples counseling?
I believe that all couples can benefit from counseling. The process affords the opportunity and space to take time out of busy schedules to prioritize one another, yourself and the relationship. Similar to the benefits of investing in a regular exercise routine that makes you stronger, investing in counseling can keep strong relationships strong and improve relationship that are struggling.
If I agree to go to counseling does that mean that I am admitting that my relationship is failing?
Absolutely not. Unfortunately some people avoid couples counseling because they fear that it signals that their relationship must be in crisis. Most often it just means that there is an issue that needs to be addressed or there is an opportunity to resolve a reoccurring conflict. The earlier that couples seek support the higher the likelihood that larger challenges can be avoided.
I want to go to couples counseling, but my partner refuses to join me, what can I do?
It's difficult when one party believes that counseling would be helpful to improving the relationship, but the other party is unwilling to participate. Understanding why your partner is reluctant to go and trying to reassure them may be effective in getting them to agree to try a session or two. If that fails, rest assured that participating in couples counseling as a party of one is still possible. I often work with individuals on strengthening their relationship. Focusing on the changes that are available to you that can positively impact the relationship is a great way to start. Together we can identify ways to improve the way you communicate, identify triggers that cause negative emotions and manage expectations that can improve how we perceive our partner can be transformative for both parties.
I see that you also do divorce coaching, are you "Pro Divorce"?
This question has come up from people looking over the various services I offer. To state things simply, the answer is a resounding "NO". Nothing makes me happier than helping a couple get back on track and seeing a marriage that is loving, healthy and stable. Unfortunately, for a variety of different reasons not all marriages stay together and when that is the case I want to be able to support couples through their separation process to reduce trauma for them and their families as best as I can.
Do you only work with heterosexual married couples?
No, I purposely use the term "couples counseling" instead of "marriage counseling" to include all kinds of relationships. Though a large portion of the couples I work with are married I have also worked with unmarried couples of all genders, siblings, parent/child, business partners, and larger family units.
If you want o learn more about how we can work together on your relationship please reach out.
-Erin Clark, LCSW